I recently watched a storm move over my small farm. I could see on the radar that it was coming. I could see the clouds darkening, almost like a blanket over my small farm. I had several notifications that the storm was coming, to take cover and to stay away from windows, yet I still watched the wind rip through the trees and branches fall. I listened to the cracks of thunder and wicked rain pound against my windows. Before long, my front yard’s dry creek bed was overflowing with water pushing its way to the fast-flowing water beside my house. It poured for what seemed like forever—time slipping.

When we find ourselves in the eye of the storm, sometimes it can seem to last forever. I do not know how long the storm lasted, nor did I pay attention to the time. I also did not follow the safety instructions I was given. I watched on worrying about the safety of my animals, concerned about the damage occurring to my property. I was not thinking of myself. Time just continued to slip away.

How often do you find yourself in a storm? Storms come in all forms, unique to all of us. Your storm might be at work or home or with a friend, financial or emotional. Some circumstances may be like others, but your experience is your own. How often are you able to heed the warning signs? How often are you just coping with one foot in front of the other? Storms can be like what happened to me, where you focus on all that is around you, negligent to your wellness. How can you shift from focusing on all that is swirling around you towards your center? What do you need? What is bubbling up from inside of you?

Reflection on what is at the core of you is key to taking any step. Finding safety and choosing yourself is a better way to deal with what is swirling around you. If you want to influence your own life and the life of others, you must first choose yourself. I know this is different than what you have been taught. Maybe you have heard, “Don’t be selfish. You need to share and help others.” There is a fine line between behaving selfishly and taking care of yourself. Self-awareness grows from reflection. Change and growth come from focusing on your strengths and values and shoring up your struggles with awareness and strategies to help.

The human brain is not considered a muscle, but it closely mimics the ability to be strengthened and grow. It is different than the bicep muscle in your arm but just as capable of strengthening. It is not necessarily about getting more muscular but more able. If you work out your bicep, you can carry more weight. If you work out your brain, you can do new things, cope, and learn.

Doctors no longer believe the brain’s potential is met at a certain age. Studies have shown Neuroplasticity within the brain occurs over time. Neuroplasticity is evident in a patient’s recovery from a stroke or traumatic brain injury. Psychology Today states, “Neuroplasticity is the brain’s capacity to continue growing and evolving in response to life experiences. Plasticity is the capacity to be shaped, molded, or altered; Neuroplasticity, then, is the ability for the brain to adapt or change over time, by creating new neurons and building new networks.” (Neuroplasticity, 2019). The article goes on to state, “The importance of neuroplasticity can’t be overstated: It means that it is possible to change dysfunctional patterns of thinking and behaving and to develop new mindsets, new memories, new skills, and new abilities.” If the brain is viewed more like a muscle, capable of getting stronger through practice, you can achieve more than you even believe of yourself. This is embodying a growth mindset. Choosing a growth mindset allows higher potential to be realized. Mindset requires awareness and practice. You choose which you have through your self-talk and continued thinking, either growth or fixed.

Storms will come. How you care for yourself is crucial in preparing for the next growth opportunity. What if next time I know to walk away from the chaos and choose to face the aftermath when the time presents itself. I will save energy on wasted worry. I cannot control what is swirling out beyond me, but I can control my own choices. Choose yourself, listen to what is bubbling up from within you. What strategies do you use to process what is brewing? Just like the water in this short video, eventually, the reservoir from underneath the surface fills. What’s inside will spill out eventually. How that occurs for you may be critical. What if you were able to have a check valve? What if you were able to control the overflow? What if you had a warning?

Try gaining clarity when you find a storm brewing by answering these questions.

What, if anything, is in your control?

What are you taking responsibility for that is not yours to own?

What emotions are you feeling?

What behavior results from your emotions?

What support do you need while the storm is moving through?

What support do you have? How will you use it?

What about this situation is important to you?

How can you choose to tend to your self-care?

All these questions are inner focused brought to you in a Coaching Model. Through a deeper reflection, you can find grounding and stability for your future. I encourage you to embrace the bubble up. There is growth in what comes to the surface. What is coming to the surface may not be comfortable, but it needs your attention. There are times when seeking support from a licensed or credentialed professional such as a therapist or Life Coach is beneficial. Or even a trusted friend. This may be when you need an unbiased partner the most. Your well-being and safety are vital. As a Life Coach, I know your answers are inside of yourself. Sometimes it takes a trained and skilled person to help you realize what is there requiring your attention. The beauty of a storm is the rainbow it leaves behind. You may not always see the rainbow at the time of the storm passing, but it is out there somewhere. It is up to you to allow the brain to grow and develop. You are not stagnant or unable. Your brain is an amazing organ. Choosing to foster a growth mindset opens a whole new avenue to travel on.

Resources:

Neuroplasticity. (2019). Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/neuroplasticity